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Quilting is truly a universal language!

                                      My Quilt Top from Hell

  Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, the tale a fateful… and now you are welcome. While you are reading this rant of a blog, you will be humming the theme to Gilligan’s Island, one of the greatest shows to ever be on television. Remember when Kurt Russell was the jungle boy? I loved him even way back then- anywhoo-

  This past weekend I finally finished a quilt top that has been in progress for about 3 years. I think I heard angels sing at one point- but that was in between all of the cussing. It could have just been the other voices in my head- I am still not sure. The dogs’ ears did perk up at one point.

   

  This quilt began as a project with friends. We were all shopping one Saturday celebrating one of our birthdays, when we saw this quilt book. My cohorts are big fans of reproductions-me, not so much. Most times it is hard for me to picture a quilt in anything other than what is in the photo on the cover. Lame, I know. I am trying, people. Don’t judge me. We also had hit a quilt show recently where this quilt was displayed in something other than reproductions. It was beautiful. So, due to the fact I was getting a birthday discount that month I actually purchased yardage to start my anti-reproduction top.

 

   A few months later, after my fabric cured for a while (this has to be done-ask any quilter-some people call it fabric hoarding but they are just on crack) I took it to a quilt retreat to work on it. As luck would have it, my friend Lexie, master of drawing and quilting was done with her project and volunteered to trace all of my patterns for the applique onto fusible web. God love her. I got the middle block fused down and a few of the smaller ones done before I left the retreat. I brought it home to let it cure some more. Again, this must be done. Right Becky R.?

   I had quite a bit of time off this year around the holidays and decided now was the time for all good men- oh wait- that was typing class. I decided it was time to get the top done. I finished all of the machine applique and was finally ready to get this damn thing put together. I starched the center block and cut it to the correct size according the directions. Then it was time to piece the 4,000 flying geese that go around the center. After I got all of those little bastards done, I read the next step in the directions, which did not amuse me. It basically said that the math didn’t work out exactly for the geese to go around the center and you may have to fudge a bit. WTH?? If I fudged at all, I would lose the points on my geese, which did not amuse me. I plowed through, and by some miracle I did not have to fudge at all. Whewww. On to the 4,250,323 half square triangles.

 

  After I had all of them pieced, I had to trim them to 1-7/8”. Odd size- and let me tell you if you do not have one of these rulers go to the Bloc Loc website and buy the 2-1/2” and 6-1/2” square ruler. Do not pass go, do not collect $200- just do it! This ruler saved my life- or my husband's- not sure which at this point.

  I was finally ready to piece the borders. I looked at her diagram, and sewed all of my units to look just like hers. I got the borders ready to put on my design wall, and guess what? The damn drawing does not match the layout of half square triangles in the quilt piecing diagram or the picture of the quilt! If you all saw smoke or heard a sonic boom Saturday coming from Thornton it was me. Poor animals- I think I broke their eardrums. After a shot of whiskey, a 3 mile walk and a trip to Sprouts (they had clementines for $2 a bag- score!) I was ready to dive back in. I figured only the author of the book and I would ever know these borders were not facing the right way. These borders were not easy- directions were telling me to use a generous ¼” seam allowance at some points, and a scant seam allowance at others. This does not float my boat. I was so close to the end, however I just kept going. Darling hubby fed me, I popped a shit load of Motrin and kept sewing. Finally, at 7:30 I was done. Finis. Finito. (I have no idea if those are words- don’t stop me now, we are almost done here).

    Here it is in all of its glory-(Olwyn if you are reading this I was not sure about an apostrophe after its- input please?) I took it on my walk this morning and found this great bench at the lake/pond. In Pennsylvania, it would be a pond. In Denver, anything over a 2’ square is called a lake- go figure. Colorado is close to perfect but we aren’t quite there yet. We made great inroads with the whole pot thing but that is just getting us started. Haha.

 

Thank you for reading this novel- have any of you had a quilt top from hell? Other then you, Lexie :)

 

A NEW BLOG FEATURE

 

 

Well, it is not exactly a new feature but it is an expanded feature!

 

 

CRAFTSY ONLINE CLASSES

 

If you look on the right side of the blog page, you will find the links to a variety of Craftsy online classes. If you see a class that looks interesting, simply click on the picture and you will be directed to that class information page.

 

If you scroll down to the bottom of the blog page, you will find even more classes. And we will occasionally post special classes as blog articles.

 

YOU WILL RECEIVE DISCOUNTS ON MANY CLASSES IF YOU ORDER HERE USING THESE BLOG LINKS!!

 

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                    I THINK I HAVE A PROBLEM-

   I have been having a terrible time making my damn tea in the mornings as of late.  The Saturday before last, I got up as usual and started to putter around the kitchen. As I heated up my water for my tea in the microwave, I added sweetener and milk to my mug. After adding the hot water to my lidded mug, I started cleaning, laundry, etc. After about a half hour I figured I better throw my tea bag out. I took off the lid and lo and behold no damn tea bag! I had been drinking hot water with sweetener and a splash of milk! And I did not notice! So, I dumped out the remaining water and proceeded to make a 2^nd cup of tea- which I did with no problem.

 

   Last week, we had some terrible weather in the morning so darling hubby offered to drive me to work. As he was out warming up the car, I was gathering my work bag and making my cup of tea. As my water was heating up in the microwave, I grabbed the milk out of the fridge and proceeded to pour it into my cup- EXCEPT it was not milk- it was water from my pitcher in the fridge- WTH???? So, I dumped the water out, added more sweetener and waited for my water to heat up. Good God- Bob did get a good chuckle when I got out to the car because I of course fessed up.

    Now- on to this morning. I am sipping my tea on the way to work thinking it just doesn’t taste the same as it usually does. I just kept chugging it down, however because it was cold outside and the tea was hot. After I finished my tea at work and went into the kitchen to refill my mug, I noticed the bit of tea left in my mug that I made this morning was dark- I never put milk in it! Oh man- what the hell is going on?

 

    I am seriously thinking something is going on. There was a call from one of our customers this a.m. looking for his doors- I received an email from him last month to proceed with his order and never gave the email to my boss to order the doors. Thank goodness the customer was not totally pissed at us- guess I better start playing those games to make your mind better! I am not retaining anything!! At this rate I am hoping to find my way home after work every day!

 

  On a better note, I had a sew day with my buddy Terry this weekend to help her through a Sew Together bag- she bought the outside fabric in Japan. Isn’t it lovely?? She did a wonderful job- this was her first bag/zipper project ever!
 

 Happy Sewing everyone- here’s to hoping I can remember how to turn on my machine!!

START THE NEW YEAR OFF RIGHT!!

 50% OFF MY LUMINOUS LONESTAR ONLINE QUILTING CLASS!

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                                                   HAPPY NEW YEAR!

   I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe New Year!  I have been lucky enough to get quite a bit of time off around the holidays this year, so I have been sewing some. I  downloaded Mr. Mercedes (by Stephen King) on my Nook and have been reading that. I also have discovered Sons of Anarchy on Netflix. I know, I know. Where the hell have I been? Well, I can only watch so many shows a week as we don’t have a DVR. But, boy I am glad I found it. The added bonus of watching 5 or 6 episodes a night is now I have been dreaming about it as well. I wake up and think- “when was Gemma driving a school bus in last night’s episode?” and “when did we get a pool table?”. I then realize that it was all a dream haha. I have really enjoyed it- wonderful acting, great characters and Charlie Hunnam’s naked butt now and then. What’s not to love? I highly recommend it if you have not seen it yet.

   Now back to sewing. Last weekend I sewed a new cover for my Nook and a matching bag to carry it in. My old cover wasn’t bad, but there was not anywhere in it to store the charger. The pattern is by Whistlepig, and patterns for both the cover and bag were included.

  Then I moved on to my latest BOM block from High Prairie quilts.

   Then I decided to sew a few bags with a pattern from Fig Tree. I had the canvas on hand- shocking, I know.  I also had a charm pack and yardage stashed and used a little bit of that up. I thought at first the pattern sucked, then I realized of course it was the dumbass reading the pattern that was the issue. I should have labeled all of the parts as I was cutting them, but NOOOO. I had to rip apart a few seams on the first bag, but the 2^nd went a lot more smoothly. Must have been the ham hangover from Christmas day- yes, lets blame it on that. They were fun to do, and you don’t need interfacing as the canvas gives the bag plenty of body. Added bonus!

   That is about all I got done- that damn show has been taking up a lot of my free time. I hope to get more sewing done this weekend and will share pics for you!

   Hugs to you all! Thank you coming along with me on this blog ride! I hope to do some fun things next year with you!